Ryan 31

Foreword: In 2004, I kept these posts on a separate blog. I wanted a place to write about my true feelings about Ryan that no one else would read. In 2007, I revisited these posts. and decided to add them to the archives. It's part of my past that is worth remembering especially the honesty with which I wrote these posts.

I'm still upset this morning. I'm not as angry as I was last night, but I'm upset. I can't quit thinking about how little emotion Ryan showed. He says he likes me "a lot" but it sounded like he just wanted to say whatever would make me happy. I guess I'm reading a lot into the situation since I feel like Kevin and I went through this. Kevin wanted more, I didn't really want more, yet felt like I had to agree to keep him. Ryan probably feels the same way. I don't want to do to Ryan that Kevin did to me. Because I know how that ends.

Now the question is, do I have the balls to stop talking to Ryan?