Month of June, 2002

Quote of the Day

"I didn't have time to click on that."
- Shaun, found on a scrap of paper from a trip to Houston a long time ago

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Sundays are for talking.

Wow, I think I'm all talked out. Spend a major portion of today on the phone catching up with friends. Thank goodness for free long distance on the cell phone. I got to talk to Autumn and Ky out in El Paso. They're trying to beat the heat (as it's already in the 100's by now). Then Kevin and I spent a few hours talking this afternoon; like we don't talk enough already. After that multiple hour conversation, I headed out of the house for some shopping and sustenance. Tonight I treated myself to sushi. A couple tuna, eel, spicy tuna, and spider rolls followed by green tea ice cream was just what I needed to make a perfect evening. I got home with full intentions of paying bills but instead took the time to catch up with Cameron, who seems to be adjusting to the New York City nightlife quite well.

So all in all, I've probably spent more than half of my waking hours on the phone today. What a wonderful thing. It's amazing that despite living so far away from my good friends, we can still stay connected. Today I feel connected...and loved. I'm so happy.

Perfect night for a baseball game

Just got home from a Ranger's game with Gary and his friends, Laura and Michael, from Witchita Falls. (Thanks for sharing your tickets with me!) We had a really good time. It's always awesome to meet friends of friends and remembering that good people attract other good people.

Before the game, we had dinner at Pappasito's. The food was great though the waiter was a little strange. And I highly recommend eating out early on a Saturday night. It's been so long since I've done it, I had forgotten what a pleasure it is to beat the rush.

Luckily the rain shower was brief and was over before we made it to the Ballpark. We had fabulous seats, thanks to some friends of Laura and Michael. The Ranger started off strong but the Astros caught up by the end. Ranger 5 Astros 8. After a beer, some ice cream and sitting outside all evening, I think I'm ready for bed. What a great Saturday night. One of the best I've had in a really long time.

Overheard in the Office

"Well, I don't smoke so I'm going to eat french fries."
- referring to studies showing french fries and potato chips can cause cancer

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Better

Life has turned a corner and is going in a better direction. I am making changes mentally and emotionally to improve things. I feel so much better today.

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Whirly Ball

Religious people play the weirdest games. I'm listening to a coworker talk about playing "Whirly Ball" with her church group. Not something I've ever heard of.

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Coffee

Took Mom and Dad to the airport this morning. They're on their way to England to meet Karen for a week of vacation after she finishes up working later this week. Talked to Karen briefly online this morning. She sounds like she's been working really had and looking forward to the time off. (Who wouldn't after working 80+ hours?)

After dropping them off I had an hour or so before work. So I stopped at Denny's to drink some coffee and smoke a couple cigarettes. I haven't had coffee in months. That's always good for the soul. The guy at the next table told me he liked my hair. I need to tell Ana, my hairdresser.

Came into work and am trying to keep my mind off things but instead it's slow. So I'm IMing with friends. Helps to hear what's going on in other people's minds instead of focusing on what's inside my head.

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Sucks

It sucks when things aren't great and all you want to do is lay in bed all day. It sucks worse that you have to go to work and act like nothing is wrong.

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Villain Supply.com

"Welcome to www.villainsupply.com, your best online source for everything EVIL. If you are a supervillain, mad scientist, warlord, dictator, or despot, then this is the place for you."

Not really the place for me but hilarious all the same.

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Importance of Career

"Why do New Yorkers attach such importance to the state of your career?" Toby Young asks in an interview about his new book, _How to Lose Friends and Alienate People_.

I don't think it's just New Yorkers. I definitely feel the pressure to be doing something that's higher up on the social status ladder than customer support. But I like my job. I don't have to take work home with me. I make enough money to cover my bills and play as hard as I want to. The people I work with are for the most part really cool. And I'm good at what I do. So why do I feel like I have to say I "only" do customer support? I'm talented and smart and I learn more everyday. This is the best job I've ever had and I consider myself very lucky to have it.

But that's not even the point. The point is my job does not define who I am. Toby made me realize this today. We define each other way too much by what we do. I've got to find a new question to ask at happy hours instead of asking "what do you do?" Maybe, what do you love?

So I think Toby has a good point but from the review, it doesn't sound like the book is worth reading. Too bad.

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Overheard at the Office

"You look like you could be a country singer."

Good Show

You know it's a good show when you don't even flip channels during commericals.

Tonight I watched Motorcycle Mania 2 on the Discovery Channel. I know, I know it sounds cheesy. But I was incredibly surprised at what an awesome show it was. Jesse James of West Coast Choppers is in my opinion a motorcycle artist. He makes amazing custom bikes. But the best part was how down to earth and open he is on television. I was suprised about how he talked about his personal life and the issues he was experiencing. Now I feel like I've seen a little bit of who he really is and I can understand why he's so successful. He's got a good heart.

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Programming Fundamentals

At work my boss is encouraging all of us to get outside training in relation to the products we support, so I'm taking a continuing education class at the local university. It's short only a couple days last week and a couple more this week. It's really wonderful that work allows me to take the time and pays for the class too!

This first class (they're allowing me to take more than one!) is Programming Fundamentals. At work, I've started supporting an automation tool. Basically it's used to automate repetitive tasks in our other applications. The trick is you have to write scripts to make it work. I'm not actually supposed to be writing scripts but I'm finding myself writing them more and more often. I didn't take too many programming classes while I got an art degree in college - go figure. I've picked up a lot at work but it hasn't really felt like enough.

So the class has been a blessing because it's helped me realize I'm far more knowledgeable about basic programming logic than I originally thought. I've also learned a few new things though not as much as I had hoped. But I've got the book which seems to be a great resource.

Being back in school is definitely different for me. I find myself interacting with the teacher and other students. I love taking notes during lecture (and have thus realized that I'm even slightly obsessive about it which is just hilarious to me). I enjoy reading the book. And I even enjoyed doing the homework last night! Yes, I have officially lost my mind. Despite how much I enjoy the class experience and learning, I still find myself being critical of the teacher.

You see, I used to be a teacher. Having studied education and practicing it for a short while, I have become hypercritical of all teachers. In my opinion, it's a curse, because it's holding me back from graduate school. I can't bear the thought of semester after semester sitting in class with teachers who lecture off topic or are monotone or can't give a decent everyday example to save their life.

This instructor isn't as bad as some, but it's also a short class. I find myself getting annoyed that he doesn't go over the material fast enough (for example, today is day 3 of 4 and we're only on chapter 6 in the book). He lingers over examples that aren't particularly important. Occasionally he wanders off track in his lecture. Or he reads straight out of the book, which is a big pet peeve of mine. I think the worst was when he kept the class 5 minutes late explaining how to search for programming tutorials using Google.

See how critical I am? I know how hard it is to be a good teacher; I really, really do. Yet, I'm still unforgiving. I think the solution for me is to take classes that are only a few weeks long. That way I don't have to suffer through any one teacher for very long. Another possible solution might be for me to go back to teaching...I tend to be less critical when I'm actually doing it.

R&D

It is absolutely amazing what kind of things IBM's Research and Development teams come up with!

Quiet

As Summer pointed out, I've been quiet this week. Not that I'm doing it on purpose or hiding anything. It's just that I don't have much to say. I'm finding that now I have a boyfriend whom I talk to every night, I just don't have the same need to blog. We all have the need for someone, anyone, to listen. I started blogging because I didn't really have that person. So I made up for it by imagining lots of people (all of you) and telling my mundane little facts of daily life. Now that I have a person who commits a major part of his time every night listening to me, my desire to share is satisfied.

I'm not entirely sure how to feel about this. The same thing happened to my private journal when I was in college. As I go back and read, I find major gaps for the time I was in a serious relationship. I think it's completely normal for us to find it easier to connect with one person rather than many. But this blog is about keeping in touch with many.

There's really nothing to conclude here. Just wanted to let you know what was on my mind and why I've been a little quiet.

Flowers

Wow! Thank you, Kevin!

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Isn't the web amazing?

I'm looking at some Louis Bourgeous sculptures in Cleveland through a website my friend Keith sent me. We were talking about her art the other day and he realized she had public scultpures around the corner from his office. It's absolutely amazing that I can see what he's been telling me about even though I'm miles and miles away. I can even change the view on the camera!! Blows my mind.

FreshBlogs

FreshBlogs is up! Check it out.

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Getting Closer

Had to get away from the office today at lunch. So I went over to Barnes and Noble to browse. (It was strictly browsing because their books are way too expensive.) At some point in my relaxing browse, I headed off to the bathroom. It caught my eye that there's a baby changing station sign on the woman's restroom door. "Figures" I think to myself, "They put the station in the woman's restroom because women are supposed to take care of the kids." Then I turn to look at the men's door. To my great surprise, they have a baby changing station too. Just one more little step closer to equality.

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Vegas!

< singsong> I'm going to Vegas! < /singsong>
Well, Kevin and I are going to Vegas. In August. For Defcon. OMG!! I can't believe it. (I'm sure he can't either since it's taken slightly over 3 months for me to really make my mind up.) I'm SO excited.

Father's Day I know you

Father's Day
I know you think your dad is really cool; maybe even "the best." But you're wrong. Because I have the BEST dad on the planet! I love you, Dad.

Today we celebrated Father's Day by having Dad cook steaks out on the grill. Hehe, just cuz it's his day doesn't mean he doesn't have to do anything! Mom cooked everything else in our fabulous lunch. Another great meal by my parents and as someone brought up today, I don't think there's ever been a bad one. I'm so spoiled.

Leaving on a Jet Plane
After lunch Mom and Dad took Karen to the airport. She's gone to Scotland for 3 weeks - 2 for work, 1 for pleasure. I guess by now she's well on her way. I know she had a million things on her mind and was even a bit nervous. But I know everything will go well and she'll do great. I could tell in the big hug she gave me before leaving that she'll miss me as much as I'll miss her.

You can't work on Father's Day!
Mom laid down the law and said Dad couldn't do any work today. So I suggested a movie. This evening the three of us went to see The Bourne Identity. Enjoyed it though it was just the typical spy movie. A lot of cool chase and fight scenes. Not quite enough character development for my taste. Thank goodness there wasn't any sex. The last stunt has to be the best by far - a 6 story fall with a twist! I think Mom and Dad enjoyed it quite a bit as well. Interestingly, they both had read the book at some point.

Birthday Girls

Last night I helped celebrate Leia and Julie's birthdays at the Magic Time Machine. There was a good sized group and it was one of the more entertaining dinners I've had in a long time. Afterwards, a few of us headed off to Tina's house to hang out. (Which has had a ton of work done on it since the last time I was there and looks fabulous!!) It was a really nice evening with good friends. On the drive home, I got stuck in the middle of a rather violent storm. Luckily I got home safely and without any problems. However, when I did finally arrive, the whole neighborhood was without electricity. I was more than slightly freaked out coming home to an empty and completely pitch black house. Luckily I had Kevin on the phone to listen to me be freaked out. It's always easier when someone is listening.

Saturday day
Saturday consisted of working on the lawn and running errands. In my opinion, the weather was near perfect for summertime. It was hot but there was a cool breeze. I spent the day outside (or with the windows down) as much as possible. I got all sorts of errands ran. And the process of meeting a rather unpleasant woman while out shopping reminded me why shopping online is so much more enjoyable.

Friday's Stain Catastrophe
Friday night after work I headed over to Mom and Dad's for dinner. It had been a long day and it was so good to see the family. Eventually Lucci House came up in conversation and Dad had heard (from Kristen) that the newly stained baseboards didn't match the rest of the room. I dragged Dad over to look at the situation with me. Kristen was right - not a match...actually, not even close. So Dad and I made a late night trip to Home Depot. We became convinced after a short while with the paint specialist and his tackle box full of sample stain that there was no hope. Even though I had originally picked out the wrong color; there was no right color. It was a hopeless cause and we should have just bought cheaper baseboards and painted them in the first place. So now we're just going to paint what we have and scrap the rest to learning. Darn, I hate it when that happens!

More Anger

Due to the storm last night, I came home to a neighborhood without power. (At 2am this tends to be a little creepy.) The horrible part is we didn't get power turned back on until about an hour ago. That means almost 12 hours without electricity. This isn't the first time we've gone hours on end without electricity. Thanks, TXU, you've really proven yourself.

Anger

What good is paying your bill online if you can't pay it on the weekends? TXU sucks once again.

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The best email I've gotten in months.

"Every time I see the movie "Singles", I remember how great it truly is. Not only because of spending a good portion of my life growing up in Seattle, but because each and every one of us is represented by a character in this film and the fact that we are all "Waiting for somebody". Relationships are., whether it be friends, co-workers, or lovers and beauty and trouble are all around, just as the geography of Seattle suggests.

In Seattle, you have incredible country all around you with the Sound bringing in the smell of the sea, rolling hills slowly peaking to the awaiting volcanic mystery of Mt. Rainer, rain forests of Bainbridge Island flooded with thick evergreen forests, and lattes on every corner. I remember going to see this movie in the theaters and jamming to the soundtrack. All of which, to this day, fill me with wonderful memories of all my past, and present relationships and just my world in general.

I get an energy every time I see this film. I'm not sure what it is. I will admit, it does make me want to fall in love. Did I just say that? I'm getting old, aren't I? More than any of that, it makes me want to keep looking for good people to let into my life. Hopefully, they, in turn, will want to share a bit of their life with me. We all meet people that we know we should have in our lives, but figuring out in what capacity, and how to communicate honestly with one another is something we will all be working on for our entire lives. But it seems as though it should not take our entire lives.

We all know how we want to communicate with others, but what stops us from doing that? Fear, ego, Hollywood? I don't know, maybe it does all work out like in the movies. We all have an introduction, then conflict, climax! And the happy ending that everyone was hoping for. Grab some popcorn and remember what Cliff, Matt Dillon's character says in the movie, "At least they love us in Belgium and Italy".

Scott"

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Stain

Spent the evening painting a second coat of stain on the new baseboards. Hopefully they'll go up this weekend because I'm ready to see the den as a complete room again. This is my first attempt at staining and I think I did a pretty good job. Of course we won't know for sure until tomorrow when it's all dry. But it seems to me that they must mix the chemicals in the stain so that it's practically impossible to screw up. I mean, why wouldn't they?

Usually there's a reason
A friend mentioned spending the night with an ex recently. Said friend didn't sleep well due to a mixture of snoring and mind racing. I, personally, think the mind racing was the bigger reason. Not that my friend really wants my opinion but I'm going to give it anyway. Usually there's a darn good reason someone is an ex. The trick is to remember that reason in times like this. Be patient, there are good things in the future. Don't cheat yourself by thinking an ex is as good as it gets.

Quiet
The house is really quiet tonight. Just me and the dogs. Well, they're not all that quiet...Bentley was just crying about something. Kristen is out of town for the night visiting Marissa. (Happy birthday, Marissa!) Karen went out with a friend. All this peace and quiet makes me remember what it was like living alone. It's hard to believe it's been almost 2 years since I lived alone. It's just as hard to believe I had my heart broken two years ago. Time really does heal a multitude of wounds. If someone had told me a few years back that I'd be living with my sisters at age 25 I would have thought they were crazy. I guess the biggest lesson learned is that you never know what life brings. You just have to trust it's going to be good. And it is.

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Who are you and why did you wake me up at 6am?

Karen woke me up this morning because Keith was on the phone. We both assumed it was Keith from Ohio and he had some really important. So only half awake I answer the phone. The first thing that tips me off that this is NOT Keith is he calls me "baby." I can only think of one person who would call me that and his name is not Keith and he wouldn't call me at 6am. So the rest of the conversation was pretty muddled as I never did fully wake up. But I made it clear he was calling the wrong person. He was insistent that we had met in the past (at Trees he said?) and that I had given him my number. I assured him this was NOT me. He apologized but was convinced a woman named Erica gave him this number as her own.

So, ladies, if you meet a guy and you're really not that interested in him, have the guts to say so. Don't wuss out and give him my number!

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Visualization

You've done a great job teaching me about visualization. At first I thought it was some hokey, new age stuff. I was surprised you'd be into anything like that, but I listened because I enjoy listening to you. You explained that it's all about getting the idea in your head. When you have the idea in your head it makes doing it that much easier.

You taught me visualization to help me work out. I had to picture myself as a person who works out. I can't expect myself to be healthy and work out if in my mind I seperated myself from "those people." I had to visualize myself as one of them. Much to my surprise, it works. I'm eating better and getting stronger because of it.

So now as our relationship progresses, I'm going to visualize myself as your girlfriend. Because if I can see myself as that, I will be able to live my life like that. And I want to be the best girlfriend you've ever had.

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PowerPoint Competition

There's nothing like a good web competition...especially one with PowerPoint.

Quote of the Day

"Sometimes I'm more boring than baseboard staining."
- Cameron

The weekend has caught up with me

What a long day. I am so ready to just fall over and go to sleep. Woke up later than I intended this morning but still managed to fit in a walk with Tiger, a workout, and a trip to the grocery store before work. As soon as I walked in to work I found out I would be spending the whole day in training. Don't you love it when you're informed? It was really, really good but had I known I'd be in a classroom today, I would have gotten more sleep last night. Got home from work, grabbed a bite, and started helping Dad cut baseboards for the den. Somewhere in there we decided doing the door frames was a good idea too. So Kristen and I made a late night run to Home Depot. I'm back, completely exhausted, and am heading for bed.

Quote of the Day

"It is still in development so it's allowed to crash without feeling ashamed of itself."
- programmer in the office

Yeah for not getting sunburned!

What a great weekend! Yesterday I had the pleasure of floating down the Comal River in Greene Texas with some wonderful people. Amanda, Jeff, Kevin, Sarah, Denise, Charles, Mark, Shaun, and I spent a gorgeous Saturday sitting around in tubes. We enjoyed it so much, we floated the river twice!

Later that evening we sat around the porch again at Jeff and Kevin's for more socializing. Though it was very, very chill socializing as we were all worn out. Of course we stayed up too late which meant sleeping in today. After noon sometime, Amanda and I took a leisurely drive back to Arlington stopping for fried chicken and Starbucks (a hell of a combo).

When I got home called Autumn and got to hear about how hot it is in El Paso right now. I know she and Ky were both praying for a cool desert breeze tonight. (Hope you guys got it!) Then Kevin and I talked. He convinced me I should see Spider Man tonight so I ran off to do that. What a wonderful, wonderful movie. Seriously. I love a good love story. I'm especially partial to the ending even though it made me cry. Tiger convinced me shortly after I got back that a walk to enjoy this cool evening would be a perfect. He was right.

As we walked, I couldn't help think about how good I have it. I got to hang out with some wonderful people this weekend who are all incredible and enjoyable in their own ways. I got to be outside for a good portion of it, enjoying the incredibly cool summer weather. I get to come home to a family (including the dogs) who loves me very much. And I have the extreme pleasure to connect with my best friends on the phone. It doesn't get any better than this.

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In Austin

Amanda and I got to Austin around midnight last night. It was a nice drive...pretty uneventful. Got to enjoy a beautiful night on the porch with Jeff, Kevin, Sarah, Ryan, Alison, Shaun, Dave, Matt, Zuzia, and Mark. (Ok, how crazy is it that all my friends have websites?) Anyhow, we hung, drank too much, took lots of silly pictures, and even had birthday cake! Kevin is now 33!! Hot damn!

We just had incredible breakfast tacos by resident chefs Jeff and Kevin. Everyone's waking up (read:getting over their hangovers) and we're just waiting for Denise and Charles before we head out to the river for a good float. Here's to not getting sunburned!

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Coonass

I can't believe one of my customers just described his name as a "coonass name." WTF?

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Bedtime

You know it's past your bedtime when your dog put himself to bed before you get there.

2nd Day in NYC

Kevin and I slept late after staying out so late. Though he does have this peculiar habit of getting up after only 4 hours of sleep. I'm not entirely sure what he does when he gets up, because after only 4 hours of sleep there's no way I can even sit up in bed let alone get up! On Sunday we headed out to see Rent. Kevin was awesome enough to ask me what I wanted to see and then get tickets. It was very exciting as I hadn't seen a musical in ages. Rent was definitely contemporary in the music, style, and story. I enjoyed it quite a bit.

After a late lunch/early dinner, we walked around Times Square for awhile. I could people watch down there forever. It is completely fascinating. We spent over an hour wandering around the Toys'R'Us. It was huge! They even had a Ferris wheel inside! I continued to play phone tag with Max which was kinda a theme that day...I'll get to that in a minute. Eventually we went to see Sum of All Fears because we both knew we wouldn't see it if we weren't together. Big media consumption day.

After the movie, which was quite good, Max and I finally connected again. He gave directions on where we could meet him and Linda for drinks. Who's Max, you're wondering? Max is yet another online friend. I ran across one of his online pieces - boobytrap.org. Dropped him a note saying I liked it and he checked out my site. Max had never seen a blog before. Max is quite verbose, so a crazy long email conversation on blogging began. We kept up a furious pace for a couple weeks. It only seemed right to get a chance to meet him since we were in the same city. So we got together for drinks. I must say I really enjoyed both Max and his girlfriend, Linda (who, by the way, is a Texan). Good conversation always makes for a good night. Even if we did stay out too late.

3rd Day in NYC
The last day of my visit, Kevin and I decided to just hang out at his apartment. There's nothing quite like sleeping in on a Monday morning. We took a walk around his neighborhood and brought lunch back to the apartment. It was good to just sit and talk. All to soon it was time for me to go to the airport. The flight back didn't seem as long as the flight up there. But isn't that always how it goes?

Back in Dallas
Now that I'm back, taking the time to catch up on all sorts of stuff. LucciHouse.com is getting a new look. Eventually I'll get all of my pictures up too. Work is busy, busy but that's a whole different story. I'm just trying to stay as emotionally disconnected from it as possible. Looking forward to this weekend's big Summer Bash at Jeff and Kevin's down in Austin!

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Back to the Grind

Kevin and I had a wonderful weekend. Now I'm in Dallas and back to the grind.

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In NYC

What a long but wonderful day this has been. Kevin and I have been all over the city today. Running errands, taking pictures, sight-seeing, shopping, and eating. It was better than I imagined being in the city would be. Maybe it is all in who you're with.

We started with checking Kevin's mailbox then having pizza on Madison Avenue. Then we picked up tickets for the late show of Star Wars at the Ziegfield Theater. Made our way down to Canal Street where we did a ton of shopping. Went even farther south to walk by the World Trade Center site and see where Kevin works. Then we caught the ferry to Staten Island which was a beautiful ride. On the way back we got to see the city lights come on. Took some time to see the NYC Vietnam Memorial which is possibly the most beautiful and stunning memorials I have ever seen due to the personal nature. Walked by the New York Stock Exchange (which Kevin pointed out is the center of financial business for the whole world...crazy) on our way back to the theater to see the movie. Incredible theather, incredible movie. We wandered the streets for a little while, enjoying the night, before catching a train back to Kevin's apartment.

It's late and I'm exhausted but it's been a wonderful day.

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